Royal Rumble 2013.

I was yelling at the tv, throwing my hands up in despair, cheering, and just having a great time. That’s how the 26th annual Royal Rumble made me feel this past Sunday. As cheese filled as this sounds, the Royal Rumble was pure magic. Everything was on point and it really came through combined with the crowd reactions.

The other matches were very good, but everyone watches this event to see 30 men get in the ring and just one emerge victorious. I know a lot of people really didn’t like it but I enjoyed every match and I was happy that there wasn’t a divas match. It was refreshing but hard to not have a pee or snack break.

That’s right. I’m admitting to liking a Cesaro match.

There were a lot of really great moments, I have one MAJOR hit and two misses for the show (my only critiques for a near-flawless show). My major hit is the appearance of Chris Jericho as the second entrant in the Rumble. I had done a fantasy list of who I wanted to see compete with a few surprise entrants and I lost my mind when Jericho came out. I had my hands on my head and literally screamed. Jericho is one of my favorites and one of the few wrestlers who brings something different with them each time they appear. A small moment but it meant a lot.

The internet community has already verbalized their distaste for The Rock and John Cena, now it’s my turn.

Cena should not have won the Royal Rumble. It’s not a matter of him deserving it or not, he didn’t need to win it. John Cena is a main event guy and does not need anything to propel him into the main event spot at a Wrestlemania. I’m sure the whole wrestling universe collectively rolled their eyes when he pointed to that Wrestlemania XXIX sign. I legitimately do not know what to say other than he didn’t need to win it, along with a few obscenities tossed in for color.

What really left a bad taste in my mouth was The Rock winning the title. What in the flying fuck is going on? I had an expectation that he would win it but I was hoping it wouldn’t happen. Him saying that he deserved a title shot made my blood boil. Showing up once every ten years does not make a champion, being there everyday and working your ass off makes a champion. So now we`re stuck with a guy who shows up when it`s convenient for him and has no real value to add other than spitting out funny words. Maybe it’s because I`ve watched wrestling for so long but no one should be handed anything. You work for what you have, not have things delivered on a silver platter. Another movie star was the champion in WCW and we all know how that ended…

Monday Night Raw didn’t deliver as well as the Rumble, in my opinion, but it was still a great show that brought a strong rating. I had a friend in attendance at both events and he said the crowd in Vegas was terrible compared to Phoenix. There were only a few standout moments, one of them being CM Punk. He always says what everyone is thinking. The Rock is being spoon fed his title reign, it’s a ratings thing. I do have to applaud Rocky for appearing for almost 14 minutes, which is probably the most we will see him for a while. Elimination Chamber is just over two weeks away, hopefully he shows up!

The standout segment, besides CM Punk, was Paul Heyman with Vince. Heyman can play that camera perfectly. We got another surprise return as Brock Lesnar returned in Vegas. I dislike Brock as much as I dislike Rocky but I do have one thing to say about it. Brock wasn’t handed a belt that he has no business having in the first place. No one needs to hear my rant on Brock because it is eerily similar to my rant about The Rock.

The one standout match was Wade Barrett and Bo Dallas. I’m always a bit weary of a relatively unknown guy but I’m willing to give him a chance. It was a good carry over from the night before, where Dallas eliminated Barrett from the Royal Rumble match. He won’t win a belt straight away but it is a fantastic opportunity for a guy like that. If he is willing to put in the work required of a champion, he will go places.

As a final thought, I’d like to leave you with my insight on the lumberjill match…

Matches like that are why women’s wrestling is never taken seriously. Ever.

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